i hope you all fall in love with someone who never stops choosing you and i hope you feel at home when you look at them
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I am in control of where I focus my attention. I am in control of what thoughts I allow to remain in my mind. At times it may be difficult to achieve, however I am in control. And I am grateful.
~Affirmations to Myself
Personal growth becomes so addictive once you realize that it’s always possible to improve your experience of being.
in therapy my therapist and i were talking about my own feelings of self worth in relationships. and she asked me to say qualities about myself that someone else would be attracted to, on a romantic and platonic level. so i named some things like compassionate, empathetic, etc. and she said “you named things that you can give someone. ways you can serve, rather than ways that you are” and y'all..my mind was blown that’s gonna stick with me forever like she then proceed to tell me actual innate qualities about myself that she liked and thought anyone else would like as well and i hadn’t even considered those because like she said i was focused on things i could do outwardly to attract and maintain connections rather than who i was as a person..goddamn!!! thats tea!!!
With this in mind, this also makes me think of the ways people describe us. When people say the reasons that they love/like you or describe you as a person, are they only naming ways that you serve them? Are they equating your worth with how much you do for them?
ex. “You’re such a good listener. You’re so generous, you’re so compassionate. You’re always there for me. You always hold me down. You’re reliable”
vs.
“You’re so funny! You’re very vibrant. You’re creative, passionate, and intelligent. You’re optimistic. You’re so talented at ____” , etc. I think that’s very telling.
Amazing
its really comforting to know that all the times i was at my lowest and loneliest in the past the whole time i had my self in the future and present who had survived those things looking back with love and tenderness and wishing desperately to offer comfort…i am my own guardian angel and i can use that knowledge when im struggling now and remember that somewhere there is a version of me that has survived this and is watching me with love and pride and joy in her heart
How to Cope with Blah Days
1. Recognise that it’s a feeling – and our moods go up and down. Shrug your shoulders, grit your teeth and choose to make it through the day. Nothing’s really wrong – and there is nothing wrong with you. It’s just the way you’re feeling – and our feelings usually change.
2. Don’t be hard and condemn yourself. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling miserable and blah, or for feeling apathetic and low on energy. Be patient, understanding and gentle with yourself. You’re no worse than others as we ALL have blah days
3. Do something rather that nothing. Do a few mindless tasks so you don’t just waste the day – and you’re likely to feel better once those you’ve got those out the way as they’re usually the things that you never want to do!
4. Only do as much as you have to. It’s going to take all your strength just to make it through the day. Preserve your energy – and allow some things to slide. You can always get round to them another day.
5. Be extra nice to yourself. One of the best ways to fight a bleary day is to be nice to yourself and to do the kinds of things that help to lift your mood and to brighten up your day. For example, go out for a coffee, or have a bubble bath, turn up your favourite music or call a bunch of friends. Do all the kinds of things you know will help to boost your mood.
6. Remind yourself that it’s likely to pass. A bad day is just a day. It’s not the whole of your life. It just means that right now you want to crawl back into bed. It doesn’t mean your goals are wrong or that you won’t succeed in life! You’re just having a bad day – and it’s likely to pass.
Just because your abuser is not consciously aware that they are being abusive, does not mean that they aren’t. You don’t need to prove it to them for your feelings to be valid.
It’s so important to practice meditating and being still, sometimes you don’t really realize how much your mind is running until you sit down and attempt to be still…
Sometimes you may meditate and your mind won’t stop, but the more you practice the easier it becomes…
It’s such a beautiful feeling ✨
I pray you never lose the goodness in your heart.
That you never lose the love in your soul.
That you never lose the peace in your mind.